Beyond The Holders
|Log in | Register|
In any city, in any country, on any planet, in any galaxy of any universe, go outside any building and just stand there at, like, 1 am or sometime around then. If, by any chance, you sit or don't stand still enough, nothing will change; you are just hyperactive and you should work on that.
Eventually, if you are lucky and the holder finds you worthy, you will black out and be inside your own mind. Your mind will look just like where you were standing, and you may not even feel the transition of blacking out and being inside your mind. Walk into the building while moving like Barbie, or doing the chicken dance. Be as loud as possible to project your gayness all the way to the holder.
When someone comes out of there apartment to yell at you for making too much noise, ask them to see the holder of WTF. (Spell it out, do not say it out loud or they may get offended and call the police- I mean, you will wake up… and stuff.) When you ask, they will stare at you for an attosecond, and then either tell you to go away or just go back into your apartment. When they do either, run outside very quickly.
When outside, try to go deeper by falling asleep. Inside your inception, Leonardo DiCaprio will tell you to go deeper. If he is not, you are doomed for you have gone too deep and have trapped yourself in Hoboken. If he is there, however, shit yourself, and he will walk away. Then you will wake up from both dream levels inside a prison block.
Then, you will most likely get raped in the anus, unless female, in which case… I don't know, I never hear about what goes on inside womens' correctional facilities.
Anyway, you will be in the prison block, soil yourself again, and then you will see a double rainbow outside your cell. Spit on it and a leprechaun will fly out of your ass with a pot of gold. He will then hump your leg, and the cell door will have a seizure. You are free to leave.
Go outside and eat some grass. The holder will realize you have issues and you will realize that you are doing nothing useful, for this journey is one of self-realization of your status as the real holder. Kill the fake holder and go home; you've had a rough day. I'm on a horse.
WTF is object WTF of over 9000. When the time comes, will anything make sense? It is up to you to decide. WTF will, however, delay that decision. Yay.
Articles in Parodies
|Last modified on 2012-10-15 03:56:00Viewed 341 times|