Beyond The Holders
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The Holder of a Test of Nothing That You Couldn't Do
In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Go to the front desk, and ask the worker to see the “Holder of a Test of Nothing That (I) Couldn't Do”. Make sure you say that it's a test that YOU can do easily, otherwise you're forcing the worker to take the test. She'll get her own object and you'll be forced to find a new mental institution or halfway house. That would be brilliant, wouldn't it?
If you word it properly, time will stop, and you will be whisked from reality into a warped realm meant to test you to the limit of your abilities. Luckily enough, more often than not the test is ALWAYS passable, as it's a test of what you pretty much can do whenever you need to. If you actually DO fail the test, then it's because you were supposed to. The only way to truly fail is not to try at all, and that pretty much just means you're stuck in this reality forever. That can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on the realm, so I will leave that decision to your discretion.
At the end of your test, you will be placed back into reality, and the worker will hand you a package. In this package is a list of all the things you have done in life that you consider a failure, packed neatly with a list of dates and times these things happened and even Cliff Notes to help you understand the inherent nature of these failures.
This package is object FAIL of 538. If only everything were so easy.
Categories: | Parodies |
|Last modified on 2012-10-07 06:24:19Viewed 7600 times|