Greetings and Salutations!
Joined in August '08. I've got a good background in horror movies, Cthulhu mythos, rp'ing/short fic writing, Stephen King mythos, and I've read House of Leaves, and agree with most people here that it's incredible.
Don't mind my southpaw spelling (I'm Australian), because as far as I'm concerned my spelling is correct for Brits, Aussies and Kiwis, and your writing is all wrong :).

Stories by me:
The Holder of Unseen Colours

In any city, in any town, go to any place that sells second-hand books or pen-and-paper roleplaying games. Find a comfortable spot, and sit or lie down there.

It helps if you have read the Vampire World series and any other piece of literature about vampires; you might then be the slightest bit prepared for the encounter to come.
Repeat to yourself "Tenebrous Jack, Tenebrous Jack. Went to Elsewhere, never came back," three times with your eyes closed.
When you become aware of your surroundings, you will be in Tenebrous Jack's palace, which He takes with Him when He travels the multiverse. It changes at His whim, but is usually a sweeping, Gothic place. You will be free to wander this immense manse - though He locks his doors, they will open to you.
Though it is filled with many and terrible creatures, they will not harm you, for visitors are treasured here.
Just make sure nobody else follows you through them.
You may encounter the shapeshifting Whampiri Lord here, or he may be out. You have nothing to fear from Him, since He has willing consorts to provide Him with that which sates His hunger. Talk, challenge him to a game, or simply greet Him and leave politely. But do not threaten Him, unless you wish death, and do not offer yourself to Him, for he will take you at your word.

When you wish to leave, find a comfortable place in the manse and repeat this three times with your eyes closed: "Tenebrous Jack, Tenebrous Jack. Went to Elsewhere, then he came back."

You will awake in the place you fell asleep earlier in, probably with a shop attendant or friend shaking you gently.

Tenebrous Jack is inhabitant 1 of 81 creatures in His manse. There are more terrible things than demons in the dark corners of the multiverse.

Categories: | Parodies |

Last modified on 2008-09-03 00:18:59Viewed 6112 times

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